If I could describe this, my 33rd year, in one word it would be transition. I have, for most of this year, been in transition waiting for one thing or another to happen. Some have and some have not. I have refrained from posting for a very long time because I feel that a story should be told in its entirety and for quite some time I didn't how this one was going to end.
Teaching in London
In July of last year I accepted a teaching position through an agency in London. After interviewing a few places, I was offered a job with the initial school I interviewed with. I was ecstatic. I felt that this was an opportunity to extend my time in a place I loved so much. I began teaching in September, just after finishing my internship at Core Arts. My thesis was still being written with the due date rapidly approaching and I was also in the process of selling my home in Idaho. Needless to say I was balancing quite a bit.
I was up for the challenge of teaching in a different country and interested to see just what the differences were between England and the States. What I found was that the curriculum content is much the same in England, however, the system is much, much different. I was still teaching novels like "Of Mice and Men" and "To Kill A Mockingbird," and focusing on literary analysis, however, I was learning an entirely new system when it came to evaluations, grading, achievement structures, school hierarchy, processes and procedures. I felt as though I was trying to learn a foreign language while teaching my own simultaneously.
I was teaching two 10th grade English classes, two 10th grade remediation classes, which focused on developing writing skills, two 7th grade English classes and one 8th grade English class, on an alternating A/B weekly schedule, with a rotating prep. Which meant I didn't have a single class consistently from day to day during the week and that the time I saw them was never the same. For example, I may have one of my 10th grade remediation classes Monday 3rd period, Wednesday 5th period and Thursday 2nd period, but the next week I may see them only twice on completely different days and during completely different periods than I had the previous week. Some days, depending on how the schedule fell, I didn't get a prep at all. I was at school most days until seven preparing for each of the classes I would have the next day. It was a steep learning curve to say the least. I'd never taught so many different preps before and had never had to juggle so much information coming in all at once. I was fortunate enough to be working with incredible people who were supportive and helpful beyond words. I learned so much in the first few weeks being there and grew as a teaching immeasurably.
During this time I was also trying to secure my new visa, as my student visa was about to expire. Through a series of miscommunications and misunderstandings I found out, just as first term was wrapping up, that neither the school (because I was under contract with the agency as a supply teacher) nor the teaching agency were going to sponsor my visa. As you can imagine I was devastated. After several frustrating phone calls and emails to the agency, it came out that when I had been handed off from one recruiter to another, several things had not been correctly communicated. I had to explain to the gal I was currently working with, that before I singed any kind of contract, I had stated the situation regarding my visa to my initial recruiter and told him that it would be an issue as it was expiring at the end of October and I would need a sponsor. He assured me, as he took a copy of my current visa, that they dealt with this kind of thing all the time and that it wasn't an issue. When I was transferred to another recruiter, assumptions were made about what had been done, and so on, and so forth, until I end up at the end of a term unable to continue teaching. My biggest concern was for the school and my students. Because of this I had left them in a terrible position and they had only a very short time to fill my position before the students returned from half-term break. Also, I didn't say anything to my students, which was the worst. I didn't get to say goodbye to them or tell them how much I enjoyed having them as students. I was just gone.
I then had to pack my things and fly home fairly quickly as my visa was about to expire. YIKES!!!
I'd like to take a moment now to confess, that when I initially took the position with the agency -which was the result of a misplaced phone call on the part of the recruiter, though I had put in applications to teach in London- it felt like the hand of God. I have previously taken two other positions in schools, both of which were the result of phone calls which came virtually out of the blue. The first phone call, a misdialed or miswritten number, resulted in my scheduling an interview at an elementary school. After the interview was over and the position offered to me, I asked the principle where she got "my" application. She told me it came from the district office. I then went straight to the district office and filled out an application. The second came during the first year of my masters and resulted in my teaching job at East Valley, which lasted six awesome years. So to me, this wasn't anything out of the ordinary. I had honestly seen the Lord work like this in my life before, so I wasn't phased by the nature of its beginnings. However, I had this nagging feeling that it was a bit too good to be true, and when it all fell apart, I felt that I should have been more attentive to that still small voice.
Home, But Not
When I got home my house was in the process of being sold and I arrived just prior to closing, which was awesome! There were a few hiccups in the process and it was stressful at times, but eventually, it closed.
This for me was bitter-sweet. I loved my home, but in the end it was best to let it go.
Let me just take a moment to tell you that while I was home I was also furiously applying for teaching jobs overseas, at colleges on the East Coast, curatorial positions, gallery assistantships, anything, pretty much anywhere. I knew I wasn't ready to come back to Idaho permanently, and having just sold my home with the mindset that I would be living in London for another year, what else was I going to do?
I was also what most people would call "a hot mess" emotionally. I was unable to sleep, so I would stay up nights filling out application after application, attaching transcripts, teaching licenses, resumes, and tailoring countless cover letters to each specific job in hopes that something would flesh out.
I was sad and anxious. I couldn't quite get my head around what this was all for or why it was happening, and even though visas fall through all the time, I felt as though I had failed in some way.
Back to London
After I sold my house I went back to London to collect the rest of my things from my flat, spend a few more weeks with friends, see some sights and say goodbye to London properly. Within the first few days back, I received a message from a colleague at the school telling me that we needed to meet up.
Angie, whom I love to bits and respect as a teacher immensely, picks me up from the tube, and in the car on the way to the pub tells me there have been some major changes within the department, and that there is a permanent position opening up and she would like me to apply. See ya later Japan, London I'm back!!! I was literally gobsmacked (I just love that phrase!). I had this ridiculous grin on my face all night, I was calling and texting people to let them know I was unofficially, but officially back! I was going to have to apply and interview for the position all over again, but I was willing to do whatever it took. Show me those hoops, I'm ready to jump through them all.
So, I had just been unofficially offered a job, again. Since I was only going to be in London a few weeks (because I had only planned on collecting my things and leaving), the interview process was going to have to happen fairly quickly. I met with the Head Teacher, scheduled a teaching interview, applied for the position online, had another interview after my teaching interview and it was done. What was great was coming back to the school and seeing my students and colleagues again. The hugs and squeals of excitement from my students (and me) were fantastic. One of my year 7's told me that she would see me in 5th period and she couldn't wait. She ran off so quickly I didn't have a chance to tell her that I wouldn't be back teaching just yet. Sitting in the lounge with my fellow teachers was an amazing feeling. When I was offered the job I took it gladly. There were still a few details to be sorted, like my visa, which the school was handling, so I was headed back home for Christmas, only now I would be returning in January to begin teaching again. Hooray!
Waiting
Before Christmas break had officially begun for the schools I came back to Idaho. Once here, I received an email from the gal handling the visa sponsorship at the school informing me that I wouldn't be able to start teaching first thing in January because she hadn't received the necessary information from the Home Office in order to push the sponsorship through. No problem, I'll just push my ticket back.
Once January rolled around I got another email informing me that sponsorship of my visa wasn't viable and that they were very sorry. No explanation as to why, just sorry. Upon enquiring why it was they were unable to secure a visa for me, I was told it was because they had advertised for the position incorrectly and because my tier 4 visa, which had expired while I was teaching there, had expired. I was so incredibly frustrated and heartbroken. Emotionally I felt like a yo-yo. I was excited, crushed, excited, crushed...WHAT WAS GOING ON!?!?!? It was a lot to take in and process. I didn't know where I would land and that was a difficult reality to be faced with.
Once the emotions settled, I went into a survival mode of sorts and began looking at overseas teaching positions again, however, this time I began looking at the Middle East, Abu Dhabi and Dubai in particular. I interviewed over Skype and was passed on to the next round of interviews quickly. This next interview was to take place in London in February and would be held with teachers and administrators from the Abu Dhabi Education Council, also over Skype. Another interview and I was informed within a week that I had been selected for a position beginning in September.
I am now officially homeless (in the very loosest sense of the word). I'm living at my parents house, working a temp job, waiting for September. I'll be teaching summer school in the Boise district in June and July, which will help occupy my time and then I'm off. But for now, I'm in transition. This has been the hardest adjustment, to exist in the spaces between the endings and the beginnings. To thrive in the lulls in which I struggle to feel like I have a place or a space that is my own.
The Lesson
I think sometimes the Lord allows us to be shaken by situations so can understand that He truly is the only thing we can depend on. He is the only thing that is steadfast and our faith, hope and trust should always be in Him. I will not say that I am adept or even good at this, but I'm learning. I am heartsick for London and miss it on a daily basis, however, I have hope that at some point the Lord will lead me back there for good.
